Punched a Car

"BobintheMtns" (bobinthemtns) 09/28/2016 at 13:31 • Filed to: None

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I punched a car yesterday afternoon. I wanted to knock off the rear-view mirror like you see the bicyclists do in those interweb videos. But the mirror was just outta reach. Luckily the passenger window was close... like, really close.

I was on my motorbike heading home from work yesterday afternoon. While crossing town, some guy decides to merge right into me/my lane. It was a 35 mph zone but with a lot of congestion (5:0o o’clock traffic) where everyone was moving swiftly (hauling ass) to get home. I couldn’t just hit my brakes for fear that whatever was behind me would flatten me.

But I was getting squeezed, and fast! I remember seeing him come in my lane, I went to the right side of the lane to escape him. I was way right, with the curb maybe 10 inches from my wheel... And the car was still coming!

I laid down on the horn! Nothing. He was still coming, at this point his passenger window was inches from my handlebar end- and the bike was only 7-8 inches from the curb now..!

That’s when I started punching the F*%k out of his window.

That got his attention, and he corrected.. Naturally, we had some choice words at the next stoplight.

I once joked to a friend that I was gonna carry a hammer on the bike to wail on cars that got too close... I might revisit that idea......

Anyway- be careful out there hombres!

Or I might beat your car’s ass!

rb1971 ARGQF+CayenneTurbo+E9+328GTS+R90S > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 13:35

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1. That’s a nice bike. I have an R90S myself. Love the fairing.

2. When I’m riding I always de-escalate situations with cagers. Always. There’s never any good that’s going to come of getting mixed up with them. You’re not going to suddenly turn them into awesome drivers that care about things around them.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 13:35

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Mobile Fisting is the new Road Head.

BobintheMtns > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 09/28/2016 at 13:36

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I’m crying.

BobintheMtns > rb1971 ARGQF+CayenneTurbo+E9+328GTS+R90S 09/28/2016 at 13:38

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Yeah, bmw REALLY nailed the lines on those fairings. And I wasn’t trying to escalate/or make the other driver a better driver- I just really needed him to get out of my lane.

extraspecialbitter > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 13:39

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Did the prick even have the decency to look ashamed? Or was he too busy trying to catch the Pokey-mans? (that’s still a thing, right?)

BobintheMtns > extraspecialbitter 09/28/2016 at 13:41

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That’s what he yelled at the stoplight essentially-

“DOOD! I DIDN’T SEE YOU!!!!”

“Yeah that was obvious! In the future, perhaps you should do a better job opening your eyes!!”

But there might of been a few extra words that start with capital F’s...

jimz > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 13:42

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“I didn’t see you” = “I didn’t look.”

Takuro Spirit > extraspecialbitter 09/28/2016 at 13:43

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My phone literally buzzed with a Rattata closeby when I read that sentence.

Urambo Tauro > jimz 09/28/2016 at 13:43

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“I didn’t see you” = “I didn’t look.”

^^^ THIS. EXACTLY THIS.

Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > extraspecialbitter 09/28/2016 at 13:45

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Yeah no. I still play. But not in the car because there’s nothing on my commute anyway so....

extraspecialbitter > Takuro Spirit 09/28/2016 at 13:45

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I control all the Rattatas.

extraspecialbitter > jimz 09/28/2016 at 13:46

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“I didn’t look.” = “I’m a worthless fuckin assbag.”

Wrong Wheel Drive (41%) > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 13:48

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I never understand the concept of “I didn’t see you”. That is a completely inexcusable reason. You are not supposed to drive based on what you can see, you should always be driving based on what you can’t see. This is why I have so much trouble driving most newer cars, I cant see shit to either side. It just leads to driving so much slower and cautiously, or at least it should for any decent driver.

Wrong Wheel Drive (41%) > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 13:51

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I see no issue with the self defense hammer. You guys have it rough on 2 wheels. Anybody that doesnt look where they are going deserves it.

Takuro Spirit > extraspecialbitter 09/28/2016 at 13:54

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Caught a 705cp Raticate when I pulled into work this morning.

for Michigan > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 13:55

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Some woman drove my aunt off the freeway with her three kids and my mom in the car. Looked right at her and just kept getting over. Thankfully the median was dry and my aunt kept her head about her and everyone was fine.

The things that some people do on the road just baffle me.

shop-teacher > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 13:55

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Gotta do what you gotta do.

AntiSpeed > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 13:57

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I really want a motorcycle but stories like this terrify me. In a world where we constantly need to remind people not to text and drive , it just seems too easy to become a victim of someone else’s stupidity.

But I enjoy riding my bike through rush hour traffic in Manhattan, so maybe it’s not so crazy.

extraspecialbitter > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 14:01

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As there should’ve been. Good to see you alive bro.

yamahog > AntiSpeed 09/28/2016 at 14:02

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That’s why I ride at the track. I used to commute on my FZ6 when I lived in CA since lane splitting was legal and the only way to get anywhere in under an hour... I prefer living now

extraspecialbitter > Takuro Spirit 09/28/2016 at 14:02

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Them things out of my league, homes. Just the rattatas

Takuro Spirit > extraspecialbitter 09/28/2016 at 14:03

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I don’t keep them. I just use them for candy and stardust and that sweet sweet XP.

TheD0k_2many toys 2little time > for Michigan 09/28/2016 at 14:10

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ive had people try and do that to me in my powerstoke. luckily i dont care enough about it and they give up before me :)

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 14:13

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Scary - glad you’re okay. What’s the loudest horn you can retrofit to a motorcycle?

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 14:18

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I hammer, or one of these - an alternate meaning to “window punch”.

for Michigan > TheD0k_2many toys 2little time 09/28/2016 at 14:22

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That’s definitely one of the benefits of driving a tank.

fintail > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 15:00

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Hope you have good insurance, and not just for the bike.

BobintheMtns > extraspecialbitter 09/28/2016 at 15:38

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The pack of traffic that this happened in was only going 40ish mph, so highly doubtful death would of happened... but still psyched not to eat a curb....

DynamicWeight > AntiSpeed 09/28/2016 at 15:44

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It’s not so bad as these stories make it out to be. Especially if you’re already used to bicycling with traffic. I find a lot of these stories come from either overly-aggressive or overly passive people with little motorbike experience. I find the appropriate style to be slightly aggressive to get away from cars as much as possible (for me anyway).

But bottom line, if you’re already used to bicycle decision making and mixing with traffic, you are going to love, just absolutely fucking love riding a motorcycle in traffic. It’s actually incredibly fun.

AfromanGTO > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 16:00

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My buddy in a lifted Silverado with a huge ass bumper that could be used as a battering ram had something similiar happen, but luckily he had a cop behind him. A stupid bitch in a Suburban or Denali was texting and driving slow in traffic in the left lane and driving shitty in general. Shed decided that she need to get in the right lane, and whipped it over without looking. My buddy didn’t slow down, and let her hit him. AKA she hit that big ass bumper. She ended up basically pitting herself, and the bumper slammed into the side of her suv. Which put the suv on its side. The cop wrote her tickets for texting and driving, failure to maintain lane, reckless driving, and impeding the flow of traffic. The suv was totaled, and my buddies truck was perfectly fine. The bumper had some suv paint on it. The cop was joking with him the whole time. Man this was a long time ago thinking about it. This must have been almost 10 years ago....

Lalkidu > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 16:06

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Well, as a fellow motorcycle enthusiast, I am glad you made it out okay. I recently honked at a lady in a red Prius in the lane next to me (she was drifting pretty badly) who had a cellphone in one hand and a pad in the other and was looking in her phone while writing something on the pad, both items balanced on the steering wheel. I honked and made a gesture to indicate “WTF are you doing?”. She looked ashamed.

Maybe its time SOME people stopped driving and gave in to autonomous cars.

bob and john > davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com 09/28/2016 at 16:30

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i’ve seen air horns fitted.

bob and john > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 16:34

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holy shit are a few people on here morons.

“dont hit unless you are prepared to pay for damages” 

*shakes head* how about pay attention if you dont want to kill someone?

glad you are okay. Cant say I condone it, but you got to do what you got to do.

side note: get-back whips are thing. with a small metal ball on the end. That may or may not be able to break windows. KNOCK KNOCK BITCHES.

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > bob and john 09/28/2016 at 16:38

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That’s what I’m talking about.

bob and john > davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com 09/28/2016 at 16:41

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not big ones, granted. but depending on how much you want to mess with the styling of the bike, you can put some pretty big horns.

then again, these people also usually have their own music blasting, so its kind of a moot point.

bob and john > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 16:43

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davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > bob and john 09/28/2016 at 17:00

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LOUD PIPES (and horns) SAVE LIVES.

Frenchlicker > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 17:29

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I’m going to side with you. There was no winning no matter which route you took so you took desperate measures.

Autofixation > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 17:38

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I’m glad you’re OK. If I was dumb enough to do that to you, I would be very apologetic at the next light.

I wear military assault gloves with kevlar knuckles when I ride my bicycle in the city and a knife in my shorts with a glass breaker point on the end for scenarios like this. Fortunately I haven’t had to use either one. Though I did have someone pull out in front of me when I was doing 30 mph (again, on a bicycle) which is decently fast. I slid sideways parallel to his car and slammed against his driver window. He stopped immediately, I grabbed onto his door frame, and now leaning against his car with us face to face through window, yelled at him. He about shat himself.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > BobintheMtns 09/28/2016 at 18:03

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I have, as a pedestrian, hit people’s cars with my hands before. Never anywhere near hard enough to do damage (not that I’m strong enough) and always a body panel and not something that might break. I mostly do it in big cities when cars come inches from running me down in the crosswalk, and it’s just so that the thunking sound gets their attention. And maybe makes them think they hit someone.

AntiSpeed > DynamicWeight 09/28/2016 at 19:28

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That’s good to know. I’m not exactly risk-averse as long as the risk is reasonable, but it’s hard to get a feel for how dangerous it is or isn’t. I tend to be overly cautious when I’m in a car, even when stopping hard when someone is in front of me I glance in the mirror to make sure I don’t get rear-ended, and I always assume someone is in/coming up to my blind spot unless I can see otherwise. So hopefully my chances are pretty good.

DynamicWeight > AntiSpeed 09/30/2016 at 11:51

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I recommend trying it out. Take the class, then go buy a cheap low displacement bike (a 250 ninja is PERFECT). Although I think being dropped into the middle of New York might be a tad on the less relaxing side, if you’re used to this stuff already I’m sure it will come very naturally.

Basically, a motorcycle is like a bicycle with god legs.